A year ago this week I moved into my first house in Mahajanga. It’s given me mixed feelings since it’s easy to reminisce about what feels to me like a decade ago, but then I laugh about it because that decade long feeling has all happened in a year. I was genuinely confused about how a year can feel like an eternity, but I’ve realized that it’s because of how normal life in Madagascar has become and how completely different life is now that my life before. It’s the stark difference and the series of adjustments to those life changes that create that sense of “been here forever” in such a short period of time. Now don’t take that the wrong way, it’s not the I’ve been here forever and can’t wait to get home feeling. Well most days anyways! The past few days I’ve been dreaming of peace and quiet. I’ve had music blaring from down the street for a 3 day circumscision party that makes it nearly impossible to sleep, let alone think. But let me make that clear - that’s not my feeling on a daily basis. In reality. I’m not sure how or if I will ever assimilate when I return home. Sure I want to go home, but just for a visit, the thought of a permanent life back in the developed world seems scary. Case in point, I had a dream (or a nightmare depending on who you are) where I was whisked out of Madagascar and didn’t get to say goodbye. I was picked up at the airport and on the drive home I cried and had a panic attack because of the cars, gas stations, sidewalks and buildings. They all seemed so modern and unnecessarily fancy. I ended up getting on the first flight to Madagascar and then I woke up. I was personally surprised by my reaction considering I miss food from home so so much! But what the dream showed me was how much this place has become home.